Bubbling Up

I am not one to obsess over something.

For one, I’m interested in far too many things. The exception: when a manufacturer discontinues something I’ve come to rely on.

Like running shoes. I don’t run anymore but 99% of the time the only thing I wear are running shoes, even in a New Hampshire winter. I’ll occasionally wear sandals when it gets too hot out, but even in 90 degree weather give me my running shoes.

Years ago, my first discontinued model arrived courtesy of the shoe manufacturer Asics. They looked like a bumblebee, fit well, and helped me keep my balance, an issue since I first stood upright. I trolled eBay and other online shopping sites and snapped up a pair whenever my size came up. Lightly used was fine as long as the soles weren’t all chewed up.

Then I shifted over to some other make and model, and the last few years it’s been a shoe from Brooks; I’m not going to tell you what color or size or model because they’ve become exceedingly rare. I’ve been stockpiling them for a couple of years and search for them about once a month…which I just did and — be still my heart! — I found not one but TWO pair.

Of course I snapped them up.

Sometime in the last couple of months, my favorite flavor of seltzer — Mango by Bubly — became exceedingly difficult to find in the supermarket, and I subsequently discovered that it had been discontinued.

I’ve been drinking seltzer for years. Started with Polar then moved to Bubly because the flavor seemed less chemical-y. It didn’t take long to settle on Mango.

I’m a little bereft. Amazon carries it and I bought five 8-packs a few weeks ago, but they never arrived because I’m guessing someone in the warehouse or at UPS hurled them a bit too hard and they exploded on contact. My order was cancelled and refunded. I’m not sure I want to try again.

I can still find it here and there while it runs through the supply chain, so this week I visited a few supermarkets that I usually bypass. As I walked through the door of Shaws/Price Chopper/Market Basket/Hannafords, I felt a frisson of expectation and — dare I say it? — play. Play isn’t something I’m not good at. I didn’t play much as a kid as my main purpose was always to keep my head down, try to cram as much into my head as possible, and perform like a trained seal when requested.

I used to feel a much-heightened version of that frisson whenever I walked through the doors of a thrift shop, but in the last few months something strange has happened: I no longer feel the physical compulsion to hit the shop.

In my recent spelunking forays into my childhood memories, I’ve come to realize that when my mother went to garage sales and thrift shops she was not only doing something where she had complete autonomy over her life, but that perhaps it was the only way she could play. And because I often went along to provide navigation — indeed, it was the only time she wanted me with her — it’s not surprising that I absorbed that association as well.

Which is something I’ve been recently unraveling in my memoir. Like I’ve said before, if you turn over the rocks and look directly at the scary squirmy slimy things underneath, they lose their power.

Of course I don’t have to look for mango Bubly, but when I scored a few packs this week, I came up with an idea for a grand adventure: I’ll be traveling a bit around New England this summer, so why not stop at any supermarkets I spot along the way?

Plus, it’s a way for me to play, which is probably the more important lesson. And when you do something that doesn’t come naturally, you never know what tiny bubbles will float to the surface.

If you locate a stash of Mango Bubly at a store near you — most of New England is fair game — let me know!

This Week’s Takeaway: Who doesn’t need a grand adventure these days? For me, it’s the search for a discontinued seltzer. For you, it may be as big as going somewhere you’ve never been or as small as buying a beautiful journal…or finally doing something that has scared you for years. Large or small, they’re all equally vital. This week, what can you do to take a small step towards your own grand adventure?